The Tripod of Spirituality

I'm in the last 2 weeks of my two World Religion courses. We've worked our way through Hinduism, Buddhism, Sikhism, Jainism, Confucianism, Taoism, Judaism, Christianity and Islam. It's a lot to cover in a single semester.

At the end of the course, I ask my students, "What do these world religions have in common?" I get a wide range of answers: a commitment to peace, an ethical code, the Golden Rule and more.

My own view is that there are three spiritual values that can be found in all of the above religions. These are: compassion, humility and gratitude. I call these values, the "tripod" of spiritual life because they uphold and support it.

Compassion is the ability to not only empathize with another's pain, but to act in a compassionate way. Humility is the ability to see yourself as you truly are and to recognize your commonality with humanity. Gratitude is the ability to see all of life as a gift and to give thanks for this multitude of gifts.

It's impossible for me to comprehend a healthy spiritual life that lacks any of these values. Obviously, we can't perfectly embody these values. However, when it comes to the spiritual life, progress trumps perfection. To strive to internalize and to live by compassion, humility and gratitude is to live the best possible life. As the Dalai Lama once said, "The purpose of religion to make us better people."

Resilience!

Yesterday, I was inspired by the story of a friend who had been through some very difficult times in his life. He escaped from Denmark after the Nazi's invaded his home country. He lost a son to a boating accident 25 years ago. His daughter-in-law has survived for 7 years with a rare and aggressive form of cancer. And, he is being treated for metastatic cancer.

Despite these difficulties, he says that he feels "lucky" and "fortunate." He is filled with gratitude for his life and is focused on how he can help others.

The quality I see in this friend is resilience. Despite being knocked down by the blows life has dealt him, he remains steadfast and positive. He doesn't give in to self-pity or depression. Even though his initial reaction to these tragedies was deep sadness, he bounced back from each difficulty.

My suspicion is that the source of his resilience is his deep gratitude for life. Gratitude is the foundation of resilience. If we can understand how we are blessed, even in the midst of challenging circumstances, we will find the inner strength and fortitude to survive and even thrive.

As I said, I have been inspired by my friend. So, each morning I'm reflecting on what I'm grateful for. I'm making a list and adding to it each day. To begin each day by giving thanks for even one thing can make the rest of the day go better. When we strengthen our sense of gratitude, we also strengthen our resilience when difficult times come-- and they always do.

A Circumstance-Proof Gratitude

Of all the qualities of character I aspire to, I believe that gratitude may be the most important. Gratitude is so basic and foundational. If we don't have it, then we will also likely lack other key qualities: faith, hope, love and joy.

The kind of gratitude I want is one that isn't dependent upon my circumstances. It's easier to be grateful when life is going well-- when we're well fed, housed, clothed and loved. But the test of genuine gratitude is when life goes against us-- when we fail or suffer pain, loss or disappointments.

The above-described "gratitude test" is one that I often fail. Yet, I want to do better. I want my gratitude to grow so large that it eclipses the negatives of daily living.

The key to gratitude is memory. When I'm feeling ungrateful, it is because I have forgotten about the gifts I have been given. The main gift to be grateful for is the gift of life. I did not create my life-- it has been given to me. Life is a gift of God's grace.

There are so many other gifts to thankful for: love, family, relationships, work, play, imagination, opportunities and more. This list could go on and on. Yet, when we're not feeling grateful, we have difficulty finding even one thing to be thankful for.

When I'm not feeling grateful, I still try to be grateful. That is, I try to remind myself of the gifts mentioned above. Our life circumstances change constantly. I want a gratitude that transcends these circumstances. I don't believe this desire is impossible, but neither is it easy to achieve. Grace can always evoke gratitude, if we will open our eyes, mind and heart to it.

The Small Stuff

It's natural to be thankful for the big things in life: a new job, a financial windfall, the birth of a child, the end of a war. However, many of the small positives in daily life go unnoticed.

A few years ago there was a book titled, "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff--and it's all small stuff" by Richard Carlson. Carlson's book was filled with practical advice for reducing stress and increasing happiness (there are 100 suggested ideas in the book). One chapter is titled, "Be Grateful When You're Feeling Good and Grateful When You're Feeling Bad."

In other words, don't allow the "small stuff" to undermine your gratitude for the little gifts of everyday life. For example, this summer has set records for heat and humidity in Connecticut. Being outside, and especially exercising, in this sticky tropical air is less than pleasant. At times, I've allowed the unpleasant weather to negatively affect my attitude.

The weather is only one of the little things that can affect gratitude. But, if we can find reasons for gratitude in all circumstances, life would go so much better. The good news is that there are always reasons to be grateful. Rather than cursing the weather, I need to be thankful that I have the ability to exercise and that my sweat glands are working.

There are so many "small" things in life to be grateful for: water, air, food, sleep, clothes, books, coffee, shoes, and so much more. Making a list of things we're grateful for can shake us out of the malaise of ingratitude and help us see daily life for the gift that it truly is.

A Prayer of Gratitude

God of love and power,
We stand in awe of the magnificence of your creation.
The mystery of an infinite universe,
The majesty of snow-capped peaks,
The vastness of the oceans,
The amazing variety of life that inhabits our world.

We give you thanks:
For the inestimable gift of life here on earth.
For the relationships that support us, especially in times of distress and adversity.
For the food and drink that sustain us from day to day.
For the opportunities to work and play, to rest and recreate, to speak and to listen.

We give you thanks for communities of faith and for the many and varied talents, skills and resources harnessed within them. We are grateful for those who serve humanity sacrificially. We are grateful for those who give unselfishly of their time to build homes for the homeless and to feed the hungry.

We pray for a world in need of your love and care. We pray for war-torn parts of the world such as Iraq and Afghanistan. We pray for those whose lives are diminished by diseases such as AIDS and malaria, strokes, cancer and heart disease. We pray for those who suffer from mental and emotional illnesses.

Give us glad and grateful hearts so that we may do the work to which you call us with joy. Amen.

Wildflower Wonderland

My final mountain hike of this trip was on the spectacular Saddle Mountain. This basalt dome is the highest in the area and the vistas are stunning. From the summit I could see five volcanoes and the Olympia range in the far distance. Because of the fog below I couldn't see the Pacific Ocean, but that was only a minor disappointment

The greatest sight from Saddle Mountain, however, is the plethora of wildflowers. On this hike I passed by vast meadows filled with paintbrush, aster, columbine, daisies and foxglove. The photo above from portlandhikersfieldguide.com shows the summit and some of the flowers.

When hiking to the summits of mountains, sometimes I focus so much on getting to the top, I don't enjoy the journey there. This hike reminded me that beauty is to be found all along the way, if we have the eyes to see.

Hiking is a good metaphor for the spiritual journey. When we open our eyes to the beauty in the world around us, we enjoy and appreciate the journey so much more. Looking at the world through the lens of gratitude transforms how and what we see.

Above the Clouds

I spent the last night of my Machu Picchu trek at Phuyupatamarca, an Inca word meaning "place above the clouds." We camped at 11,500 feet in elevation and looked down on a cloud rain forest. The photo above is of clouds spilling over the mountaintop.

Being above or within clouds is a mystical experience. There is something magical in being close enough to clouds that you can touch them. Several of my fellow trekkers commented on how awesome it was to look down on a sea of clouds spilling over the mountains as if being poured out of a bowl.

The next morning, we hiked up to a high place to watch the sunrise on Salcantay, a sacred mountain to the Incas. Our guide had each of us take three coca leaves, say a prayer and blow on them three times. This ancient ritual was moving when framed against the first rays of light on the high, snow-capped mountains. The photo below shows what we saw.


Ancient peoples expressed gratitude and awe at the sunrise and sunset, as well as many other wonders of the natural world. There is something so right and so very human about continuing this tradition.

A "Second Life" Beyond Cancer

There is a poignant feature in today's New York Times about survivors of cancer. In addition to an article by Katherine Russell Rich who has survived Stage 4 breast cancer for 17 years, there is a wonderful photo gallery. Here's the link: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/04/08/picture-your-life-after-cancer/

Many of these survivors view their life in two phases: BC (before cancer) and AC (after cancer). A theme running through many comments is that a survivor of cancer has a "second life." The image of the phoenix above symbolizes this new life.

There is an undercurrent of gratitude for life reflected in several comments. Jennifer McLaughlin Cassidy wrote, "Little things mean a whole lot more...Post-cancer, things have changed. I'm truly experiencing life-- not just living it."

Yodi Collins wrote, "I died of cancer in 2004, and via a meticulous chemotherapy regimen was reborn six months later, in 2005, into something remarkable. I have spent the past five years since then celebrating that giddy spring day. Today I am love and hope and joy and wisdom and strength."

Linnea Duff wrote, "As someone with a terminal illness, I am acutely aware of what a gift each and every day is, and I have learned to focus on the simple wonders of being alive."

These stories of hope, gratitude and courage are inspiring. They help me realize what an amazing gift life is. I don't believe you need to survive cancer to realize this, but facing death has a way of deepening your appreciation of the wonders of life.

Gratitude and Deprivation

Why does it take being deprived of something to make us appreciate it? I've been pondering this question lately. For example, I routinely get a good night's sleep, but when I have a bad night of sleeping, I suddenly become thankful for all those good nights. Another example. It's been raining in Connecticut for the past two days and I'm thinking back with gratitude about the string of sunny, warm days last week. Must gratitude depend on deprivation?

I recognize that that it is "human nature" to take the good things of life for granted. Yet, this is a part of my human nature I am striving to overcome. I want to be thankful for the multitude of gifts that are part of my daily routine: enough food to eat, a roof over my head, satisfying work, opportunities for recreation, good health, and a good night's sleep.

The key to cutting the tie between gratitude and deprivation is to work at being continually thankful for the routine gifts of life. This involves a shift of attitude and focus toward the goal of giving thanks throughout each day. Here are some practical suggestions. When you awake, lay in bed for a few minutes giving thanks for a full night's sleep. When you eat a meal, offer a silent or spoken grace for it. When you take a bath or shower, offer thanks for the gift of water. And the list goes on and on.

Naming the gifts we continually receive is a way of giving rise to gratitude without having to be deprived of something. Nothing good in life need be taken for grante

"Was Blind, But Now I See"

When I don't wear my contacts or corrective glasses, I am legally blind. The definition of "legally blind" in North American and Europe is have 20/200 vision or less in your best eye. Fortunately, my vision can be corrected to 20/20.

For the few moments when I wake up each morning, I get a taste of vision impairment. It's a little scary not to be able to see clearly. I can only imagine what it would be like to not be able to see at all.

However, there are other kinds of blindness just as debilitating as physical. There is the blindness that can't see beyond outward appearances. When afflicted with this kind of blindness we focus on physical beauty and ignore inner beauty. Even worse, we might judge the value of a person solely based on physical characteristics. The title of this blog is from the hymn "Amazing Grace." It was written by John Newton, a slave trader, whose eyes were opened to the horrors of slavery. He was not only able to see his own wretchedness, but also God's grace.

In the spiritual realm, a form of blindness is the inability or unwillingness to see life as a sacred gift. When spiritually blind, we don't/won't recognize what is good and holy in the creation, including each other.

The cure for spiritual blindness is to open our eyes to the sacredness of the surrounding world. To see the world through the corrective lens of gratitude is to recover our sight. As with cures for other kinds of blindness, this is a process that can take time and effort. Yet, it begins with the simple words, "thank you."

Twice Bombed

Here's how I read the newspaper every day. After reading the front page and the sports section, I go right to the obituaries. Why? I don't think it's morbid curiosity. Neither is it because I want to check to see whether my name is there. I read the obits because they are often interesting and sometimes fascinating.

Today, I was fascinated by the story of Tsutomu Yamaguchi, who died at the age of 93 in Nagasaki, Japan. He was the only official survivor of both atomic blasts in Japan in 1945. However, there were an estimated 165 survivors of both blasts. These survivors were known as "nijyuu hibakusha" or "twice-bombed."

In his later years, Mr. Yamaguchi campaigned against atomic weapons. In 2006 he wrote a memoir and participated in a documentary about double bombing survivors. When the documentary was shown at the United Nations he called for the abolition of nuclear weapons

Here's what he said about surviving the blasts: "I could have died on either of those days. Everything that follows is a bonus."

Wouldn't it be great if we could see each day as a bonus? I don't believe we have to have a close brush (or two) with death to realize that life is a gift. All we have to do is be grateful for each day and give thanks to the Giver of the gift of life.

Where Does Gratitude Come From?

In light of having recently celebrated Thanksgiving, I've been thinking about gratitude. How does it arise? When am I most grateful? Where does gratitude come from?

Gratitude is at the center of nearly every major religion. It is one of the two key duties in Islam (along with submission). In Taoism, gratitude is connected with humility. In Buddhism, gratitude is an important ingredient in compassion. In Christianity, gratitude is a key virtue. In Judaism, gratitude is at the heart of the concept of covenant.

Obviously, gratitude is at the heart of a spiritual life. So then why aren't we more grateful? I think part of the answer is that it is too easy to take things (and people) for granted. When something good happens, we often think "I deserve this," as if we are entitled to the gifts we receive. An entitlement mentality negates gratitude.

Where does gratitude come from? A wise sage whose name I can't remember once said, "Grace evokes gratitude like the voice evokes an echo." In other words, we are grateful when we get in touch with the fact that we are recipients of grace. Since grace, by definition, is unearned and undeserved, we cannot help but to be grateful when we receive it.

I am most grateful when I am most humble. When I become aware of the gifts of food, shelter, and companionship that have been bestowed upon me, and how little I deserve them, I become thankful. I once heard someone say that the most important prayer we can utter is two words: "Thank you!" Being able to say those two words and really mean them is to be grateful.

The Recovery of Wonder

As a child, I remember feeling wonder at all kinds of things: thunder, insects, a new toy, lightning, Christmas, chocolate. Children have a great capacity for wonder. Yet, as we grow into adulthood wonder diminishes.

I wonder (no pun intended) why? Maybe as our capacity for rational thinking increases, wonder decreases. Or, perhaps everything becomes so familiar and routine, we lose our ability to be surprised. "Been there, done that" kills wonder.

However, our capacity for wonder doesn't die. It becomes dormant and can be reawakened with practice. For instance, this morning I saw a glorious sunrise over Long Island Sound and felt wonder. The sky turned a deep red just before the sun peaked over the horizon and the sun itself was even redder. One of my fellow rowers commented, "This looks unreal."

Seeing our world through eyes of wonder and delight involves appreciating the beauty that surrounds us. At the heart of wonder is gratitude. When we are thankful for the daily gifts that surround us, we are more likely to experience wonder.