Struck by Grace in the New Year

As we begin another year, the gift I hope for all of us is the gift of grace. The late theologian Paul Tillich understood grace as "God's radical acceptance of us." My favorite Tillich quote on grace comes from his book, The Shaking of the Foundations.

Grace strikes us when we are in great pain and restlessness. It strikes us when we walk through the dark valley of a meaningless and empty life. It strikes us when we feel that our separation is deeper than usual, because we have violated another life, a life which we loved, or from which we are estranged. It strikes us when our disgust for our own being, our indifference, our weakness, our hostility, and our lack of direction and composure have become intolerable to us. It strikes us when, year after year, the longed-for perfection of life does not appear, when the old compulsions reign within us has they have for decades, when despair destroys all joy and courage. Sometimes at that moment a wave of light breaks into our darkness, and it is as though a voice were saying: "You are accepted. You are accepted, accepted by that which is greater than you, and the name of which you do not know. Do not ask for the name now; perhaps you will find it later. Do not try to do anything now; perhaps later you will do much. Do not seek for anything; do not perform anything; do not intend anything. Simply accept the fact that your are accepted!" If that happens to us we experience grace. After that experience we may not be better than before, and we may not believe more than before. But everything is transformed.

A Circumstance-Proof Gratitude

Of all the qualities of character I aspire to, I believe that gratitude may be the most important. Gratitude is so basic and foundational. If we don't have it, then we will also likely lack other key qualities: faith, hope, love and joy.

The kind of gratitude I want is one that isn't dependent upon my circumstances. It's easier to be grateful when life is going well-- when we're well fed, housed, clothed and loved. But the test of genuine gratitude is when life goes against us-- when we fail or suffer pain, loss or disappointments.

The above-described "gratitude test" is one that I often fail. Yet, I want to do better. I want my gratitude to grow so large that it eclipses the negatives of daily living.

The key to gratitude is memory. When I'm feeling ungrateful, it is because I have forgotten about the gifts I have been given. The main gift to be grateful for is the gift of life. I did not create my life-- it has been given to me. Life is a gift of God's grace.

There are so many other gifts to thankful for: love, family, relationships, work, play, imagination, opportunities and more. This list could go on and on. Yet, when we're not feeling grateful, we have difficulty finding even one thing to be thankful for.

When I'm not feeling grateful, I still try to be grateful. That is, I try to remind myself of the gifts mentioned above. Our life circumstances change constantly. I want a gratitude that transcends these circumstances. I don't believe this desire is impossible, but neither is it easy to achieve. Grace can always evoke gratitude, if we will open our eyes, mind and heart to it.

The Grace of the World

One of my favorite Wendell Berry poems, "The Peace of Wild Things," follows.

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

Many of us find our peace in places of natural and wild beauty. Summer in particular is a season to spend some time in wild places through a hike, a boat trip or kayaking, cycling or running. Even sitting on a beach and looking out into the ocean, a pond or a lake can feed our souls.

The key is to find those places where you can "rest in the grace of the world" as Berry puts it. Such places abound if we would open our eyes to the beauty around us and within us.

The Dwarfing Power of Nature

Since I had the day off from teaching yesterday, I spent the day climbing Slide Mountain, the highest peak in the Catskills (4,180 feet). In the photo on the left by Scott Larsen, Slide Mountain is the tallest peak in the background.

This hike was a favorite of John Burroughs, a 19th century naturalist and nature writer. He was the John Muir of the Catskills and there is a plaque in his memory near the top of Slide. Here's what he wrote about the view from the summit:

"The works of man dwindle, and the original features of the huge globe come out. Every single object or point is dwarfed; the valley of the Hudson is only a wrinkle in the earth's surface. You discover with a feeling of surprise that the great thing is the earth itself, which stretches away on every hand so far beyond your ken."

I, too, had a sense of looking into eternity while on the summit of this heavily forested mountain. On a clear day, you can see 34 of the 35 peaks above 3,000 in the Catskill range, as well as the Hudson River valley far in the distance.

John Burroughs reminds me that the works of nature dwarf the works of humans. That's a humbling, yet uplifting, thought. When we become aware of how vast and endless is the universe, we recognize our own smallness and insignificance. Yet, as the Psalmist observed, we are each valued and loved by the Creator of all that is. Significance has been bestowed upon us as an act of grace.

The Peace of Wild Things

Some of you have asked me about the Wendell Berry poem,"The Peace of Wild Things," I quoted from in yesterday's blog. Here's the full text of the poem.

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

What a beautiful and lyrical way of articulating a way to feed our souls, especially when we despair about the future. Connecting with the natural world brings about inner peace and a sense of freedom from despair. I believe this peace and freedom is the result of knowing that we are part of a creation that is older, larger and grander than we are, a reminder that we come from the earth and will ultimately return to it.

By connecting with nature we become grounded and centered in the present moment and experience grace.

The Subtle Power of Water

The gentle rain this morning has reminded me of the importance of water in daily life. We encounter water each day in the form of a bath, shower, or hand-washing. As a rower, I spend four mornings a week atop the water (but hopefully not in it!). Not only am I in or on water, I drink it. Without water, we cannot live.

Water is a powerful symbol in many religions. In Christianity, water is used ritually in baptism as a symbol of God's love. In Islam, water is used in ritual washing before prayer. Ritual washing is also part of Hinduism. In Taoism, water is the primary symbol of the Tao (or "Way").

The Tao Te Ching includes this verse about water:
"The supreme good is like water,
which nourishes all things without trying to.
It is content with the low places that people disdain.
Thus it is like the Tao." (Chapter 8)

Water is infinitely supple, yet incomparably strong. Over time, water is one of the most powerful forces, even more powerful than earthquakes. The Grand Canyon stands as a stunning testimony to the power of water in the form of the Colorado River to cut through even the hardest of rock.

Without water, life cannot continue. Because of its power to sustain life, water is a perfect symbol for divine grace. Yet, I take the water I drink, bathe in, and row upon for granted much of the time. Every time we touch, taste or see water is an opportunity to give thanks for this amazing gift.

Grace in "The Soloist"

Last night I watched the movie "The Soloist." What an inspiring film! The movie is based on a true story of the relationship between journalist Steve Lopez (played by Robert Downey, Jr.) and brilliant, but mentally ill, homeless musician Nathaniel Ayers (played by Jamie Foxx).

The relationship between Lopez and Ayers develops into a friendship that has many ups and downs. Lopez works for the LA Times, is dissatisfied with his job and life, and is looking for a meaningful story to write about. Ayers is a musical prodigy who dropped out of Julliard after developing schizophrenia, is living on the streets of LA and playing a two-string violin.

The friendship between Lopez and Ayers transforms both of their lives, which is the inspiring part of the movie. At one point, Lopez is telling his ex-wife (who is also his editor at the Times) about how he feels about helping Ayers. He says, "I can't find the right word to describe it." She answers, "The word you're looking for is 'grace'."

Seldom have I seen the word 'grace' so accurately and beautifully portrayed. Grace is that undeserved and unexpected love and acceptance we receive in life. It can come through a relationship with another person, with nature, or with God. Theologian Paul Tillich's synonym for grace is "unconditional acceptance." He believed that grace often strikes us in the midst of life's difficulties, "when we are in great pain and restlessness."

Discovering grace is one of life's transforming moments. When grace comes, we often don't recognize it, or call it by the right name. Yet, we know it as we experience it. It is the experience of wholeness, unconditional love and overwhelming joy.