Giving Human Gifts

In this time of shopping, buying and wrapping presents to give, I'm thinking about a different kind of gift giving... human gifts.

What is a human gift? It is a gift of time and love. Some examples: a supportive email or phone call to a family member or friend in need, fixing a meal for someone close to you, shoveling the snow off the sidewalk of a neighbor, taking a walk with someone close to you.

These human gifts don't cost money. You don't have to shop for them. You don't need to wrap them. You just need to be creative in giving your time.

As a child I remember giving my Mom the "gift" of "ten lawn mowings without complaining." I think she appreciated this gift more than any store-bought gift.

Although I enjoy receiving store-bought gifts, it is what they represent that is more important: that someone took the time to think about what I would like and then took the time to get it.

There is something deeply spiritual about any act of giving. Yet, giving human gifts seems to nourish the soul in a richer way.

Giving as Self Giving

More than any other time of the year, the period between Thanksgiving and New Year's is a season for gift giving. Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa fall within this period. All of these celebrations involve gifting.

One important component of active spirituality is giving. Although I recognize the dangers of commercialization of any holiday, I also believe that the effort of giving gifts can be soul enriching.

When you give a gift, you have taken the time to think of what would please the receiver. You have also either shopped or invested time in making the gift. And you have taken time to wrap and deliver the gift.

When you think about it, the true gift we give is the gift of our time. Time is our most valuable resource. We can't make any more of it--that's why it is so precious. When we give our time to something or someone, we are saying, "You are important to me."

Giving gifts can be an act of self-giving. When we get in touch with the love that motivates us to want to give and then take the time to carry out this thought, gift giving becomes a spiritual act. I will try to keep this in mind as I wait in long lines at the Post Office this week to mail several gifts!

A Month of Giving

In today's New York Times "Science Times" there is an excellent article by Tara Parker-Pope titled, "In Month of Giving, a Healthy Reward." She interviews Cami Walker, who was recently diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.

When Ms. Walker was first diagnosed, she was devastated. She went to a holistic health educator and got a surprising prescription: give a gift each day for a month. She followed this advice and details her experience in a new book, 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life (Da Capo Press).

Ms. Walker gave gifts like making a supportive phone call and saving a piece of chocolate cake for her husband. She said, "Giving for 29 days is not suggested as a cure for anything. It's simply a coping mechanism and a simple tool you can use that can help you change your thinking about whatever is going on. If you change your thinking, you change your experience."

The article cites several studies that document the health benefits, physical and mental, of giving. It seems that volunteerism and altruism make for a healthier life. One benefit is that helping others takes the focus off a preoccupation with one's own problems and shifts it to others.

This paradox that giving benefits the giver more than the receiver is at the heart of Christianity, which teaches that giving one's life in love results in authentic life.

I'm going to try Ms. Walker "prescription" of giving a gift for 29 days. That should take me past Christmas. How about you?